How do you know when to give up a dream?

Okay. I am at USC Aiken and these science classes are killing me.


Well not literally, but there is something not quite right here.

I went to my Genetics Lab, thinking that it was time to determine the sex of the flies that we are supposed to genetically be crossing so that we can understand Mendelian Genetics better.

So, I put the flies to sleep and put them under the microscope.

Then I saw it.

One of the females was getting ready to lay eggs.

I was a little disturbed, so I chose another one. I knew then I couldn't use that batch because they had been "tampered" with. But that was another female who was also getting ready to lay eggs.

As I sat there, I felt the bile rise, and it hit the back of my throat. I was utterly horrified at what I saw.

I don't particularly care for bugs, especially when they've been magnified as many times as it takes to actually see the characteristics to determine the sex of the bug, Drosophila melanogaster (If you've never seen one google image search).

The emotion I remember feeling is fear.

I've been performing horribly on the quizzes in the class. But everyone is.

But I'm not everyone.

I remember thinking, how am I to do my lab if I get sick at the thought of sexing the flies?

I don't feel like I am cut out for this, but I know it is fear. How am I to overcome this fear of failure, so that I get out of my way so that I don't fail?

Seriously?

I know I should study harder. Without question. That's what I am going to do. And get used to the abdomen images, by forcing the "sickness" away.


Peace and Blessings
Bumble